Also, I don't think it is right of the reader to 'excuse' Cnaiur's rape of Conphas.
Fixed that for myself, clearly a typo. I don't think Proyas was raped, other than whatever skeevyness of power dynamics/age dynamics. It's not like Earwa has age of consent laws, it's more like ancient times where you have your bar mitzvah and now you're an adult, no teenagers. if we were to assess it by today's standards their relationship would be statutory rape, of course.
Anyway, I found the quote I was looking for that illustrate's Cnaiur's crush on Proyas. It's subtle. But remember Cnaiur has been REALLY close to Proyas for months.
And he thought of Proyas.
On the worst nights he hugged himself in the blackness of his tent, screaming and sobbing. He beat the earth with his fists, stabbed holes with his knife, then fucked them. He cursed the world. He cursed the heavens. He cursed Anasûrimbor Moënghus and his monstrous son.
Bakker, R. Scott (2008-09-02). The Warrior Prophet: The Prince of Nothing, Book Two (Kindle Locations 5799-5802). Penguin Group. Kindle Edition.
btw, the "and he thought of Proyas." paragraph is preceded by two paragraphs, one thinking of Serwe as his Proof, the next thinking of sex with women and then the paragraph, "and he thought of proyas." which is clearly followed by a description of the turmoil he feels at his sexual attraction to men, including masturbation, and the paragraph ends with the invocation of the man he most loves, Moenghus.